Tonight I saw a picture of my ex for the first time in over a year.
He got a tattoo.
For some reason that wrecked me.
I don’t miss him, I don’t want to be with him. He was never right for me. He hurt me more than he made me happy.
I think just seeing him looking happy; moving on, just makes me angry.
I don’t want to be vindictive. But I want him to be as unhappy as I am sometimes.
I don’t like being single, but I don’t want to be in a relationship just because of that. The next one I’m in needs to be for the right reasons, with the right person.
We need to be able to build each other up, and laugh when things are good, and hold each other up when they’re not.
I’m not going to settle.
But I wish life would hurry up. I can’t stand the thought of him being happy while I’m suffering. It’s infuriating.
I guess I am vindictive.
I just want to move on from this. I hate that I’m still grieving this. I hate that he’s still making me cry.
Because seriously, how dare him. After everything he put me through…
I just want to feel completely content with myself.
I just feel so fragile.